Renewed faith in life and running

After my negative rant/whine extraordinaire on Saturday, I now feel like a complete ass because the weekend pretty fantastic, half-marathon included.  Yippee skip!  Also, I am now confident that I will survive the next 2.5 days of work and will then breath a huge sigh of relief.  This is the final stretch of THIS time of year, and I plan on taking full advantage of 2+ weeks of vacation!
As for the weekend, everything came up roses.  Michael and I were total movie nerds, watching the final disk of the LOTR trilogy - the director's cut.  Even though I had seen it before (like everyone else in the world?), watching the entire trilogy again was completely satisfying and quite tragic and "The Return of the King" is really well done.  Even though I knew the ending, it still made me sad.  On Saturday night, we opted for a period piece, the most recent cinematic interpretation of "Jane Eyre" which was great!  I always forget how different Charlotte Brönte is from Jane Austen - talk about Romantic with a capital "R"!  Souls, spirits, mysticism, freedom, the individual, love...  Yes, I ended up in tears at the end!  It has been several years, maybe 20 (see, several), since I read "Jane Eyre", but maybe I should venture back through those pages?  I hate it when a movie prompts me to read the book, it makes me feel guilty for not having read the book.  But, in this case, I'll give myself a pass since I really DID read the book, albeit a while ago.
As for the Sunday morning race - it ended up being a real "race" rather than a pathetic and miserable slog through 13.1 miles!  The weather was chilly but perfect - as much as I love a sunny race, the overcast sky made for a pleasant run.  Adding to that, the run was well-organized, flat and fast!  It also offered up a taste of an area that I don't know well at all - Oxnard, CA!  My love of strawberries has bred a certain familiarity with Oxnard, more or less the "Strawberry Capital" of Southern CA.  I had not, until now, ever wandered down its fine streets!  While some of the course took us through a random industrial office area, we also ran by fields, schools, and great neighborhoods, ending at the Oxnard waterfront - which I didn't even know existed!  The local support was amazing - there were bands, plenty of water stops, port-a-potties at several of the mile stops. As for the run?  I couldn't believe how great I felt throughout the race!  I tried to run a relaxed pace, not too fast, not too slow.  I also had the good fortune to meet up with Kalli around Mile 6!  She was looking good and ended strong!
Regarding my final time - it was a surprise to me.  I hoped to run a sub-2-hour and crossed the line plenty under that, much to my total surprise and delight!  After stumbling around happy yet a bit dazed, I returned home to pizza, an ice bath for my legs (KILLER) and then a nap - all contributed to my recovery!  I was even able to pull it together to look 'appropriate' for the evening's festivities - the annual holiday party (on a Sunday night - really?  How is that a true party?).
As for the week, I am sticking to my plan to take a needed break from running and can't wait for the break from school that will be here sooner than later.  However, I've revised my view of running - I *heart* running, training, non-training, the races, and, of course, all the pain and anxiety involved.  That said, I do look forward to 2012 as a new year that will offer new challenges.  Looking back, I've enjoyed some amazing experiences this year that connected to running, in one way or another, and I can't wait for more!

December and running ruts

I'd like to shirk my sense of responsibility and blame how I feel right now about running and other aspects of my life (work burn out?) on: the fact that it's December, we had weird weather a week ago, and I simply feel crazy busy and just want to get the hell out of dodge.  Nice, right?!  This is not an ideal mindset going into a, gulp, half-marathon tomorrow which will be the longest distance I've run in recent years.  In fact, my last half was about 7 years ago.  I would like to say that I took the opportunity to focus and train well, but that would be a blatant lie.  So, yeah, we'll see how the run goes.  I would like to aim for a sub-something-minute mile pace, but I would also like to actually enjoy the experience and be happy with my performance, either sub-whatever or sub-par.

The "enjoy the experience and be happy with my performance" is good advice for me to take, especially considering a serious lack of focus on my part.  Still, it amazes me that even when I don't really put the time/effort in, I find it frustrating when/if I don't feel that I've run my "best".
The 5K I ran last week represents this perfectly! Initially, I signed up for the race hoping to run a fast 5K, a distance that I don't particularly like too much. As race day approached, we experienced bad weather and much uncertainty, and I should have changed how I was framing this run mentally (should have, should have, should have...), especially when we woke up on the later side with fairly foggy heads from a wee bit too much vino and we crossed the starting line about a minute after the gun went off.  This was Michael's first 5K, but I wanted to run fast, so I ditched him and ended up having a so-so experience, running somewhat slower than I hoped/expected.  Hindsight is 50-50, and looking back, I see that running with Michael and just viewing the race as an opportunity to have fun would have been advisable.  I'm going to try to take that advice tomorrow as I slog my way through 13.1 miles.
I will say that it's not just my racing mojo that seems to have hit a hard spell. Thursday's run marked one final sign that my running game is in sore need of rejuvenation.  While I pounded out 6.5 or so miles without a huge issue physically, I found the mental release to be zero, zip, nil, and THAT was what I needed most.  My seventh period class put me in bit of a foul mood (not because of the students but another reason played a role) and then I got home and discovered that one of our dogs had decided to help himself to part of an expensive chocolate bar (he is fine, by the way).  So, I hoped and expected the run to be a zen moment for me, after which I would feel trouble-free and enjoy a clear mind.  THAT did not happen - instead, I was still fuming about my end of day encounter.  So much for the healing powers of running.

Looking at all of this, it signals to the obvious:  I need to take a break from running.  Gasp!  So, from December 12-December 30, I plan on skiing (downhill and Nordic, if possible), walking, hiking, maybe some indoor rock-climbing, snowshoeing and ice-skating, and more walking and hiking and lots of hanging out with friends and family and dogs.

Now, I just need to get through 13.1 miles tomorrow and 5 more days of work, and then life will be grand!
Then, come January 2012: Swim, bike, run!